Teach But First, Virtues

“Teacher Lee, why do you never get angry? I must learn spiritual cultivation from you to learn your patience！”

Last week, a colleague adorably said that to me out of the blue.

I have been teaching for 11 years unknowingly. Teaching my clients and young children are not very different. Both are equally clueless, both need the guidance of an experienced teacher. Some children also turn out to be more sensible than adults. In this process of guiding, when I am strict, whether the clients or students can accept the teachings, will depend on their trust in me and their personal learning attitude.

As a teacher, adaptability and spontaneous reaction are very critical. And these are the three matters that I am very principled in:

1) I do not praise the outer appearance of my students.

Many parents will doll up their daughters for class. Some little girls will come with fanciful braids and in different princess frocks every week. There are some who even wear a sparkling tiara. No matter how prettily dressed they are, I never exclaim at them, “Wow, how cute! How pretty! How beautiful!”

A classroom is not the stage for a beauty pageant. I do not wish for the young children to build their self worth based on external appearances, and have an empty heart. For the children who do not get praised on their appearances by me, what would they be thinking? What if they too wish to dress up next time? What is going to happen if their parents do not have the financial ability to support their vanity?

.

One P1 girl liked to dress in denim shorts and sleeveless cropped tops. Very often, she would complain of coldness. Once I got very stern and told her, “You know that the classroom is air-conditioned. Why did you come to class without a jacket? You do not see me dressed like you, your classmates do not either. Every week, you would get so cold that you cannot focus in class and would interrupt me often with your complaints of coldness. Tell me, is this a problem you or Teacher Lee created?”

She replied quietly, “I created.”

“Since you created this problem, then you have to solve it yourself. Do not push your problem to me. That is very selfish of you.”

That day after class, I reminded her mother to pack a jacket for her. After knowing what happened, her mum said, “Aiyah, she lah, always want to dress like that, say like that then pretty.”

“Madam, the kid does not realise that, so she needs the reminder from her parents. I have already spoken to her and I seek your assistance.”

That was the last time the little girl ever complained of coldness in my class again.

.

It was the first lesson of a new academic year.

This child hid beside the classroom door. Regardless how her mother advised or coaxed her, she cried non-stop, refusing to step inside the class. All the kids were already seated, sans for her. I looked at her minute figure, and looked at the clock. The class got to start soon. I had to think of a way.

I walked out of the classroom and stretched out my hand, “Good afternoon, I am Teacher Lee. Can you tell me your name?”

In between her blubbers of tears and mucus, the child told me her name. I exclaimed, “XX, wow! Do you know that your hair is very pretty? It’s curly and bouncy! Teacher Lee likes it a lot! Did Mummy comb your hair for you, or did you do it yourself?”

Just like that, in our mini Q&A, I slowly led the child into the classroom. That was my first and last time complimenting on her looks. I sincerely do think she has really pretty natural curls. From what I heard, when this child goes for make-up lessons in other classes, she would still cry like a baby, except for my class. She couldn’t tell me why either. I guess, this is an elemental affinity of our teacher-student bond.

2) I value manners in my students

A colleague once told me that assisting me in my class was an enjoyment, as the class had good order and the children could do their work well.

I insist that children must greet the teachers when they enter the classroom (Many don’t). They are not allowed to talk during lessons, and definitely not in English. When they submit their work, they have to do it neatly and not throw it onto the teachers. If they wish to go to the restroom, they must stand properly and ask, “Teacher Lee, may I go to the restroom?”, and not grab on to their pants and yell, “Teacher, I want to go toilet!”

I am very principled on this, and my colleague asked why the extra emphasis on propriety and courtesy?

Courtesy is the very first form of kindness that we humans learn, and it remains as the easiest kind deed to do.

My reply was: so that we can create a conducive learning environment, that the teachers enjoy teaching in and the children revel learning in. Knowing how to say thank you, sorry and giving way can enhance inter-personal relationships. When these children grow up, my hope is that with their good manners, it pave the way for better relations with people, and life will be much easier for them at home and at work.

3) I have expectations towards children of stronger abilities

In every class, there will be some children that are especially smart. They learn fast and finish homework at the speed of lightning. Problem is, when they are better than their peers at a young age, they do not always understand the concept of helping one another.

Once, I asked a student who had finished her work to help her weaker classmate. Halfway through, she made loud exasperation sounds and I immediately put a halt to her behaviour.

“There will be times when you do your homework wrongly or do not know how to do. And every time when I teach you, have I ever shouted at you?”

She pursed her lips and shook her head.

“Then why did you not learn my teaching attitude to help your classmates?”

She could not say a word.

“You are very smart and I am happy that you have strong learning ability. However, I hope you do not use your cleverness only for yourself, but also to help your friends who are slower than you. Just like how we teachers use our cleverness to help all of you, so that everyone can improve themselves together. Such cleverness is the most amazing kind.”

When Heaven bestows great abilities onto you, you have to learn how to shoulder greater responsibility. As you plough these seeds of kindness, you then regain the affinity for great wisdom even in your next rebirths.

Having taught 300+ students in over a decade, I have met many different types of parents and children. In this journey of teaching, I have had students who pushed me down with force, scratched me and bellowed at me. I once witnessed a fellow teacher, who had her palm stabbed by a student with a pencil. It was somewhat an accident, but still…

Many parents have the time to give birth to children, but do not have the time and ability to teach. That is a fact of reality. It is always with a slight regret that I cannot use my Metaphysics ability to help them manage their domestic issues, but within the four walls of a classroom, I do my best to help parents groom their children.

Be it my clients or these young children, in my heart, there is never a bad student. Sometimes, it is just that I have yet to find a teaching method that is most suitable for them.

This year, I met many great teachers who are working very hard to contribute to the children. I am thankful to have their help, and also thank you to the parents who have showered me with gifts this year.

We are all architects of the human soul. Let’s work hard so that we can give the children a very healthy growing-up process, for their childhood memories to be beautiful and meaningful.

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